Sunday, August 3, 2014

camp lyfe

excerpt from my camp journal July 27th through July 31st, 2014

Junior High Girls Camp--Sunday, 10:16 pm.

Nothing happens that isn't supposed to happen.

Think on that for a moment.

All the things that happened to you these past years...Grandma's cancer, Grandpa's mental issues, friends being stupid and leaving, not being prepared for college, Abby's cancer, Mom's eye...

All that stuff is and was supposed to happen. For a purpose.

I guess I've really seen that in the past few days, what with all that's going on. I can't imagine trying to go to college with my mom's eye out-of-whack and my grandma dying. This--me not going to college/not knowing what I want to do in life--happened because God knew exactly where I needed to be right now. To heck with all the people who think it strange that I'm waiting--I'm home. And that's where I'm supposed to be.

In other news, CAMP!! Girls (JH) starts tomorrow, and I'm so excited!!! I'm in Australia, the room by the pool, with Abby R. She's a really sweet girl, and I'm looking forward to knowing her better over the next few days.

Joanna and Sarah and flying solo...it's just the the two of them in a room with the girls. Should be an adventure. :P

Mr. Train is going off. I HAVE NOT MISSED THEE, SIR!!

I saw Lillian today--and by saw I mean the moment I saw her I ran toward her and we tackled each other in a hug and I think my knee has a bruise from how hard we collided. I missed her SOOOOOOOOOO much. I don't know how I'm going to survive the non-camp season.

Welp. It's 10:30 and I need to pray for the girls and home and all that.

I'm at camp again! Home at last!

Day One of JH Girls--2:13 pm

F.O.B. time! Hallelujah! Actually, I'm not too tired yet, but socially this is nice. Quiet, calm, and introvert friendly.

Abby and I have a good group of girls. We have 2 or so quiet ones, a crazy loud few, and the rest are moderate. Perfect mix. Funnily enough, we have both an Abby and an Elizabeth in our cabin...

Apparently I'm going to be called Momma Bear. Oh well. It doesn't hurt to be a wee bit motherly/bossy.

My eyes are falling shut. Maybe I'm more tired than I originally thought.

10:39 pm.

I. AM. TIRED.

But a good day. A really good day. The dynamic in this group is very good. I love these nuts girls. And I'm tired. Sooooo exhausted.

Today consisted of scraped knees, crazy pool time, dragging introverts out of their shells, Hitler and bad jokes...yeah. It's been nuts.

And now I'm gonna go to bed.

2nd Day of JH Girls--3:41 pm.

Wearing my TFioS shirt in a camp full of pre-teen campers and teenaged counselors was one of the best--or the worst--ideas I've ever had. I've heard the words "I loooooooooooooooove your t-shirt" so many times today.

And now for F.O.B time. Exhausted still.

3rd Day of JH Girls--10:21 pm

yo, it's mah birthday! Wut wut!

It's actually been a crazy good day today. If I'd been at home, it would've been a  semi-usual day--except for the whole funeral arrangement thing--I would've been in my room most of the day...watching Supernatural and Roommate, studying, sleeping. Yeah. Boring.

Today, I got to be with so many people, do so much, have so much fun. Even having to think of Gma's passing, I still had crazy fun.

I love it here.

I really can't wait to go home.

And I really can't wait to come back.

Also, Josiah has the World's Best glow in the dark Dora the Explorer t-shirt EVER.

And contrary to my cabin's popular belief, homeschoolers do have the moves. Exhibit A: Abby R.

Day Four of JH Girls--10:18 pm.

So many things don't matter here.

and so many things do that get neglected.

I forget that a lot.

It's okay to let the girls run wild for a little while.

it's not okay to let one of your campers sing somewhat inappropriate secular songs all the time just because "they're not singing the bad part."

I forgot that.

it's okay to admit that it is physically hard to verbally comfort someone.

it's is also okay to just be there for them and hold them until the crying stops.

I forgot that.

I realized today that the Devil really didn't want me here this week. REALLY REALLY REALLY didn't want that. All the things that happened before, during, and after camp were and are his instruments. But I was meant to be here today, and I was meant to hear what Bandi had to say. I woke to all the bitterness in my life.

And I'm going to let it all go.

Even that person who left me because I started to change. Even the person how doesn't realized he's hurting me when he unintentionally ignores me. Even my grandparents. Even the people at my church. Even the cancer that ate a 4 year hole in my life. Even myself.

So yeah. I learned that today. It kinda changed my perspective. A lot.

Funniest moment today: during F.O.B. time this afternoon, I was resting, only to be woken up by Abby shaking my shoulder and whispering while giggling, "So...I kinda just dropped my schedule in the toilet..."

I'm still giggling.


9 comments:

  1. I love this<3 sounds like you had a good time up at camp! I loved a lot of really cool points you made and things you came to realize. Gods pretty cool like that. I've been praying for you!
    Keep growing in the Lord!

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  2. :) So many pieces to this I love. I do NOT want to let you go this week(various reasons) but I WANT you to go and learn and fly and come home again more whole than you left. Look for the joy & change when He prods you in a direction. Trust that the plan He has is BIGGER than the one we could try to piece together. Yer mum

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  3. I've been working on reminding myself the same, that everything that happens happens for a reason. It makes it easier, going through struggles and all the hard times, knowing it is all in accordance with God's plan and there is a reason behind every one of them.

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  4. That's so sad about your family, and so many things all at once. Isn't it good to know that God's in control?

    Happy birthday!! August 3rd strikes me as a good birthdate somehow.

    I sort of had a similar experience with being a counsellor at teen camp earlier this year... the whole realizing that the devil does not want me there, but God does. And he showed me that...I was meant to be there for several reasons, one of them to comfort one of the girls simply by being there for her, like you said.

    Take this rightly, but I'm glad I'm not the only awkward young adult counsellor who sometimes forgets to stop the teens when they've gone a bit too far. Especially since, a lot of times, I feel much more like their peer than their counsellor...

    Question: what is F.O.B.?

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    Replies
    1. Oh, and by the way...
      you have been nominated for the liebster award
      || the writeress ||

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    2. yes, it's AMAZING to know that I can trust to God take care of it all. Sometimes my heart gets wearied by all that's going on around me, but knowing he's there for me to lean on helps me keep going. :)

      well...I'll agree with you there; August 3rd does seem like a good birthdate...however, it's not mine LOL. I posted this on August 3rd, however, my birthday is on July 30th. I could see why you thought that tho. It gave me a good little giggle. ;)

      F.O.B stands for Flat. On. Bunk., which is a nice way to saying rest time. It's God's Mountain's room leader's favourite time of day. :D

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    3. Oops! Of course, I knew that. (Or I should have.) Glad to have made you laugh, though :) July 30 is cool, too, obviously. ;)

      Haha that's awesome. Of course it is.

      I love the new look! I mean, I loved the old one, too. But the new header and the blue theme is awesome, also. {I love the ocean pic}

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  5. Love reading this! Super happy you got to be there this summer (as I've told you dozens of times)

    Who is Mr Train?

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  6. the train that drives by like every 5 hours, silly...I dubbed him Mr. Train in my head after the first week. *facepalm*

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