{how to live: look before you leap}

Hello, world! I'm back for good from camp--a rather melancholy thing, but also a very good thing. I'm glad that I got to experience such an amazing adventure and that my experience went out with a bang...but I know I'm gonna miss it like crazy.

Even though I just got back from camp and I've learned so much and I want to talk about it, I can't. I'm not ready yet. I need to process it all, to digest it. And that could take days. Weeks. Months. I don't know.

But in the meantime I want to share with you something that I've been thinking about a lot these past few days.

look before you leap.

what does that age-old cliche make you think of? Personally, the first place my mind goes to is leapfrog and that kinda amuses me... I've heard this saying a lot in my 18 years, and somehow, it's applicable in every situation.

Except for this particular situation, I thought.

I have a friend, okay? (*snickers*) (okay, I have more than one friend...) I used to hate her when we were younger, but now we're older and I fully admit that she is one of my best friends. I love her, and I would miss her terribly if she got up and left. However, she isn't what I would call the most intelligent in her friendships. Another friend and I jokingly call her the "creep-magnet" because she attracts a lot of creepy guys for some reason. And over the years, that friend and I have grown accustomed to "weeding out" those creepy people, or helping her see that she really needs to not be friends with this or that person, because she really has a hard time saying no to people.

and that was all fine and dandy until she met a guy. and she liked him. but our other friend deemed creepy, just like the others.

I never got a chance to personally meet the dude. I only heard about their interactions via social media (they lived a fair distance from each other) and I'd only heard tell of him from the friend who was determined that he was a creeper. The girl who liked him didn't say much in defense, mostly because she was trying not to like him and failing and because me and my other friend were bashing him a lot. It wasn't until their relationship became Facebook official that I found out how much she liked him, and even then I thought they were both stupid and crazy. I mean, they live at least 6 or 7 hours away from each other, met only a handful of times, and only communicated via Snapchat and texting for most of the time before they decided to date. Everything about this relationship was messed up, my friend and I decided, and although we supported her because she was our good friend, we didn't think this was smart. We were waiting for the relationship to fall into pieces.

well, I got a chance to meet this young man this week at camp. I got to work with him, seeing him at his best and his worst and when he was around her and when he wasn't. And it was interesting. Because he wasn't creepy at all in person. A little bit forceful, a little bit of a sarcastic individual--occasionally a jerk but not too often--he turned out to be a fairy nice kid. I enjoyed teasing the two of them and being sarcastic with him and it was a lot of fun, hanging out as a third wheel. I still have a few doubts that their relationship will be very long, but I am rooting for them now, and I hope that they will both be happy.

But throughout the whole time I was with them, the terrible untrue things I'd said concerning him were festering within me. I felt terrible for saying so many unconfirmed things. I'd trusted my other friends first impression of him wholly, and it had turned out wrong. I wanted to erase everything I'd said, every text I'd sent saying something about them and their messed up relationship. I wanted to wipe it all away and forget about it.

And that's when I remember the saying "look before you leap."

please. Don't jump in blindfolded with your own preconceived notions only to find out that you've jumped into a mud puddle. Don't ever think you know it all and that you know what's best for people. Don't ever say something you don't know for sure. You'll regret it later.

please. Just look before you leap.


  1. Judging others is so easy. I know. :/
    This is a really good post, Ely. Really super good.

  2. Ahh dear, what a great post, Ely. I know that I judge the people I meet wayyy too quickly - and, usually, too harshly. Case in point, one of my best friends now is someone I wrote off as being a stuck up brat when I first met her. xD

    Also - may I just say that the composition of this post was extremely well done? You are an incredible writer! No, seriously. I loved how open you were with your own experience, and how, at the end, you just made a quick, simple summary of sharing what you had learned. It was just so pleasant to read, and left me thinking. :)

  3. Very very wise, Ely. ;) And I agree, it's super easy to judge things off what someone else has sad. I do that a lot. *hangs head in shame* and I shouldn't!

    Thanks for stopping by @ Notebook Sisters!


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