there are no jumpscares in this post: a movie review

to be quite honest I love jump scares. I'd like to be all macho and tough and not freak out every time one happens, but I do jump and scream. I do this in COD4 when I turn around and someone standing there watching me. I shriek and do that girl thing with my hands. I don't like it, but  I really can't control it.

I did it this while watching the Scorch Trials. Cranks, being basically zombies, are great for jumpscares. And the weird thing is--I love the rush that comes from the scare. I haven't watched that many horror movies, but I do know I'm not a fan of the scary supernatural...but I don't think zombies bug me. After the biggest jumpscare, I felt like I could run a mile. The adrenaline makes me feel a lot better, pain-wise. It gives me something to think about. Weird. I find it hilarious that normal every day things like ordering food or making small talk give me anxiety, but zombies don't scare me.

but we do know that I'm not going to last very long in a zombie apocalypse. that requires little things like being able to run and eat whatever food you can get your hands on. not gonna last that one.


wow. that was a sidetrack and a half. this was supposed to be a review of the Scorch Trials. I have a feeling we're not going to get back on track.

I'll try anyways.

moooooving on....

I saw this movie late. I liked the first movie a lot--and not just because of Dylan O'Brien. This was the first seriously suspenseful movie I'd ever watched, and I loved it.

I have a confession to make. I don't like the Maze Runner books. I read the first one. I didn't hate it. I just got lost a lot and was very confused. Maybe it was the gluten-fog, maybe not. I don't know. I do know that I didn't even make it through the Scorch Trials. I got about halfway through and was done with it. My dad actually finished it, and he said it confused him as well. Plus he hates zombies.

guess who I dragged along to see the movie? oh yeah. I wasn't the only one jumping.

I'd heard mixed reviews about this movie. some people loved it; others couldn't get past the discrepancies between it and the book. since I hadn't read the book, I can't judge it according to what it goofed up or what it kept, but from my opinion, it was pretty good. especially for a sequel. sequels have rough luck, because they're that bridge between the exciting beginning and the exciting's wobbling between to the two and unless it can support itself, it's going to flop. and I don't think the Scorch Trials flopped.

as I'd never seen a zombie movie (because Warm Bodies doesn't count), this was an adventure. there were jumpscares aplenty, and as I have already said, I loved it. most of the time I don't jump, but this one got me several times. I also love the anticipation of the coming threat. the Cranks themselves weren't too nasty looking--they'd definitely seen better days. the ironic part was that I didn't really get scared when the Cranks were doing their thing, but when Brenda fell on the window and couldn't get up and the glass was was that stressful. it cracks me up that I can't handle that but zombies be no problem.

i will make all the scarf jokes...

also, Newt was as sassy as ever. Thomas Sangster was spot-on for this character, and I love how he's one of the funniest characters without hardly ever cracking a smile (in completely unrelated news, I can't unsee Ki Hong Lee as anything but Dong from Unbreakable Kimmy Schimdt or from  his Wong Fu Production videos.)

I do have one bone to pick with this movie. personally, I have no issue with language in movies, music, or books. now, this being said, I do have a limit--and the Scorch Trials had a favourite word. It was uttered about every other scene, and at first, I just shrugged. it doesn't bother me. but as the movie progressed and it was hissed out every time anything stressful happened, I started to roll my eyes. there is such a thing as using language tastefully to portray the pressure or the severity of the threat, but when you overuse the just seems cheesy. kind of like you're trying too hard.

just like Thomas Sangster, I am so so so happy they chose Dylan O'Brien for the role of Thomas. Spot on. now that I watch Teen Wolf, it's especially fun to look at the differences between Stiles and Thomas. since I'm not heavily invested in the written character of Thomas, I can't accurately judge Dylan's portrayal of him, but from what I've read and what I know about the character, I think he does a splendiferous job. Can't wait for the Death Cure. And more Teen Wolf.

as I said, dad went with me, albeit a little unwillingly. (he was so sweet--I said we could go see the Martian if he didn't want to see the Scorch Trials, but he said he wanted to see it since I wanted to see it.) to his surprise, he liked it a lot more than the book. in his paraphrased words: "the book was confusing. it bounced all over the place and a some of the subject matter was uncomfortable to read, let alone watch. the movie trimmed things down and it made it make more sense." and then he tried to ruin the Death Cure for me but I made him stop. :P

overall, I really enjoyed this movie--not enough to go see it again, but I'll definitely buy it when it comes out on DVD.

and finally, to the person who brought their six year old to see this movie...I judged you. the whole two hours. that poor kid.


  1. I want to see this so bad mostly for Dylan, but I loved the first one. I only read the first book, and I was confused too. I didn't know it had zombies in it, that excites me. My dad is always my movie buddy, sometimes we go to his movie sometimes he goes to mine.


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